Mr. Impractical

Fall Garden

2010-10-14T14:44:00.000-07:00

This year we dug up a patch of garden in the back yard, and planted cucmbers,yellow and zucchini squash, peppers, lettuce, carrots, and corn. In the end, most of the zucchini was a no-show (not that I mind), though we did get some of the yellow squash. The cucumbers tried to take over the whole patch, and did yield several nice specimens — more than we could consume, in fact. The lettuce and carrots eventually emerged after several weeks of dormancy, and a few pepper plants have even appeared (after I went ahead and dropped in a few store-bought seedlings).

The most fascinating to me has been the corn. Early on, heavy rainstorms threatened to kill it, nearly flattening the young plants. I kept propping them up, watering and feeding them, and fighting off the pests that seemed determined to gobble them up.

I was also warned that it is very difficult to get a handful of corn plants to bear fruit, because they don't pollinate each other as well as a whole field does. But I found a gardener online who explained how to manually pollinate corn(!). It was a fascinating experience, daily monitoring the plants, gathering the tassles, collecting pollen, and applying it to the silks. In a short time I gained a little education in the complex workings of just one of God's creations, and participated in the process myself.

At this writing I've just harvested my first three ears, and dutifully iced them down. We'll soon steam them and get an idea of what "Texas Backyard Sweet Corn" tastes like. If the weather holds, later on we may get to enjoy some peppers, lettuce, carrots and tomatoes (added later).

No More "Cooks Illustrated"

2010-08-06T16:58:00.000-07:00

I just cancelled my "Cooks Illustrated" magazine gift subscription and told them to refund the purchaser's money.

I simply have no interest in any magazine whose publisher thinks paid subscribers want not one but two layers of BUY! BUY! BUY! advertising on heavy cover stock attached to the outside of the magazine, so that there's no way to detach all that unwanted extra baggage without destroying the magazine itself (the staples all come out unless you give the ad removal process the time and attention of brain surgery — and I have neither the time nor the skills for that).

I get enough junk ads in the mail already, thank you very much. Anybody willing to permanently attach more of the same to a magazine — times two — has permanently lost my attention and interest.

The operator didn't even ask why I wanted to cancel (and I didn't volunteer it), which I think shows how insignificant are subscriber losses compared to the profits they're making.

Harrumph!

'Bates Method' Vindicated

2009-05-14T20:15:00.000-07:00

This year, my birthday present from the state of Texas was a formal acknowledgment that I don't have to wear corrective lenses (glasses) to drive.

In order to renew my 'license' to travel in Texas, I had to appear at a 'Department of Public Safety' office and (among other things) take a vision test.

I passed the vision test without glasses(!), which seems to affirm that the 'Bates Method' exercises and philosophy have paid off.

After 20+ years of wearing glasses, it's refreshing to experience such vision improvement apart from the status quo 'you'll always need glasses' mentality.

Faux Fendant & Quintessential Coffee

2008-12-08T20:16:00.000-08:00

As our family has explored and enjoyed various renditions of the classic (cheese) Fondue, we have observed that the Portuguese "Vinho Verde" wine is made from the same Chasselas grape as the classic Swiss Fendant. Locally, the "Vinho Verde" is available at a fraction of the price of a true Swiss Fendant, but (in our experience) provides the same (if not better) dry, fruity experience, especially since the locally available Swiss Fendants tend to be a few years old and (therefore) past their prime.

The classic Swiss Fendant wine is normally ideal for a Fondue, but whether due to age or not, the quality of authentic Swiss product available locally leaves something to be desired. The "Vinho Verde" is a very suitable substitute. Allowed a few moments to divest itself of its mild carbonation, it ‘becomes’ the Fendant.

Until very recently, I never thought I'd ever be roasting my own coffee beans. But after buying some green coffee beans and roasting them in Mrs. Practical's hot-air popcorn popper (which eventually died performing the same duty), the benefit of fresh roasted beans became rather obvious.

We have since invested in a 'FreshRoast Plus 8' roaster, and although it takes considerably longer to achieve the same darkness of roast as with the popcorn popper, the 'proper' roaster has performed quite satisfactorily (so far). The aroma of fresh roasted coffee beans is yet another of the sensory delights our household now regularly enjoys.

La Grange (TX) Fly-In '08

2008-08-04T20:28:00.000-07:00

Our "celebration" of August 1st (the Swiss National Holiday) was punctuated with a long-overdue visit with fambly in La Grange, where — as providence would have it — an annual Fly-In BBQ took place at the local airport. Private aircraft flew in from all over Texas to participate in a $7-per-plate fund-raiser BBQ, and locals were welcome to join in and mingle, which we did.

We had the pleasure of soaking up some Texas heat, while getting up-close and personal with a few dozen private aircraft and their handlers. Of particular interest (to Mr. Impractical, at least) was learning of the Van's "RV" Kit-Built Aircraft.

In any case, some decent BBQ was had by all, and the flames of yet another impractical interest were kindled in yours truly (thanks Mom!)...

Fleet 'Downsizing'

2008-07-26T13:48:00.000-07:00

Weary of being nickel-and-dimed to death (in $100+ increments) by our Honda Odyssey, this month I asked — okay, ordered (politely) — Mrs. Practical to just get rid of it. We had been considering replacing it with something more economical, like a Toyota Corolla, but I was getting so frustrated that I had lost interest in even owning another vehicle: I just wanted to be rid of the Odyssey.

Next thing I know, she's found (and we've traded in the Odyssey for) a 2007 Corolla with a 5-speed standard transmission(!) at a very good price.

The Wallace Fambly Fleet as of July 2008

So we're still a two-car fambly, which will be handy as Ben starts working and taking college classes (his niche seems to be logistics, and I'm delighted that he knows that already). The Corolla will be my commuter. This is the third Corolla I've owned, and I've been generally satisfied with the previous two, so I'm naturally optimistic about this one. It weighs a little over half what the Honda weighed, and is more fun to drive(!).

(We won't be buying another Honda. Ever.)

Raclette

2008-07-04T15:24:00.000-07:00

Last month I introduced the family to Raclette after buying a table-top Raclette grill and about a pound of Raclette — a cheese made (in this case) in Switzerland, that one melts, then eats with stuff like little potatoes, gherkins, mini-onions, etc. Bündnerfleisch (a thinly sliced seasoned, salted, dried beef originally from Canton Graubünden) is rather scarce in Texas, so I substituted some Prosciutto.

Tasty stuff, this — but while we all enjoyed the meal, the general consensus from the panel of tasters was that they would like to try using Gruyère next time. Having grown accustomed to the stronger flavor Appenzeller imparts to our Fondue, they found Raclette a bit on the mild side (except when really cooked to a well-done nearly crisp condition, which Ben found delightful!) Use the Raclette on the Rösti, they said. And so we shall.

The Wedding

2008-05-25T13:21:00.000-07:00

Well, it's over...

Yesterday I walked my daughter down the aisle to a new life as Mrs. Jason Graham.

All but one of the photos in the following slide show are courtesy of (i.e., pilfered from) my sister:

There's also a "Dance Video" edited by the same sister.

Immediately following the wedding and reception, Mrs. Impractical and I shifted into decompression mode, at the conclusion of which additional posts may become available here.

Better Vision, More Fondue

2007-12-31T09:32:00.001-08:00

Here's Our Happy Fambly's 2007 Holiday Photo for All to Enjoy:
All in all, 2007 ended on a pretty positive note. By God's grace, our fambly faced no major catastrophes or health issues. In October Jess (right) became engaged to marry (they've set the date in May 2008). Having been initially apprehensive about the speed with which their engagement took place and what we perceived as a lot of "not-ready-ness," we were subsequently able to observe that she and her fiancé were approaching the matter with a good measure of maturity — pursuing premarital counseling, taking financial planning seriously, and seeking a church home together — and so Mrs. Practical and I elected to give them our blessing. (The photo at right is one of Mrs. Practical's first with her new [Christmas present] camera from — of all people — Pootie herself.)

Ben (giving Mom a "Tough Guy" look here with his new cap and wristwatch) has taken an interest in playing the harmonica, and has been faithfully accompanying me to the range to shoot our new K31 (more on that below). He has half a year of school left, during which he will doubtless begin driver training next year (oh boy!). The quintessential teenager, he eats a great deal at all hours, and remains slim and trim (just like I once did). He still reads a lot, mostly fiction these days, and plays computer games.

Nick (shown here hugging a tree — NOT his political ideology) also reads a fair amount, plays computer games (of course), and enjoys playing chess (usually more than the rest of us, whom he regularly beats). He and Ben together have taken on responsibility for some of the digital audio processing duties at church, and they continue activities with a local home-schooling 4-H club chapter.

Mrs. Practical has taken up furniture refinishing, after "inheriting" her grandmother's old desk. It's been a learning process (for HER — I just stay out of the way, try not to breathe any fumes, and help move things when needed). She remains a voracious reader, an excellent cook, homemaker, teacher, wife, and mother. These days we enjoy pleasant walks together around our neighborhood most afternoons and evenings.

APPENZELLER FONDUE X 2

We managed to score a quarter wheel of Appenzeller cheese from a local dealer at a nice discount because there was "a little mold on the rind" (which doesn't affect the cheese itself, but I didn't consider it my business to tell them that). So just before Christmas we had two Fondues with family members in less than a week. That was enough for most of the fambly, which means I'll be happily nibbling on Appenzeller (and maybe sharing some) for a few weeks into the new year.

Oh the Women in My Life — Three generations of smiles at "The Hill"
(best burgers & onion rings for miles around Bellville, Texas).

BETTER VISION(!) ... BETTER SHOOTING(!)

As reported in a previous entry here, since discovering at the gun range (rather suddenly, and with no small measure of alarm) how badly my vision had deteriorated, I've been doing eye exercises in hopes of improving my vision, for shooting purposes, if for no other reason. As part of the regimen, I've also stopped wearing any glasses at all.

Good news! I did observe a perceptible improvement over several weeks, and on New Years Eve I did my best shooting yet at 50 meters with the iron sights of the K31. I could see the target more clearly than ever before. (It was also Ben's best day with that rifle to date.)

My best of two targets (3rd and final magazine of the day) is shown at left. It's still not as good as it could be, but much better than my first experience with the same rifle over a month earlier. (The bayonet was added just to show it off in the photo — we don't practice with those at the range.)

So it appears that the Bates Method has some merit. I aim to continue with the exercises and see how much improvement I can achieve. It's a joy to be able to shoot the K31 with some (improving) measure of accuracy without the need for any vision aid.

New Heights in Impracticality

2007-11-23T12:50:00.000-08:00

This month Ben and I surprised my Dad by showing up unannounced for the monthly Gun Show in Austin. It was a good opportunity to spend a little time with Dad, sell some flags and decals (and even some ammo!), and stock up on stuff like Jalapeño Summer Sausage.

We sold more of everything this time (but still not a single framed picture), and had a motel room for both nights, making it our most pleasant show for quite a while.

And though we otherwise managed to break even in terms of sales v. expenses, I decided to finally spring for a Swiss K31 military rifle. (Official Excuse: I'd been wishing for one for some years, the supply appeared to be ready to dry up, and I found one at a good price.)

These rifles have a terrific reputation for quality workmanship and accuracy (they're Swiss, after all). The bolt pulls straight back without external rotation, which makes chambering a new round a bit smoother than with typical bolt-action rifles. The six-round magazine holds a unique Swiss-made (of course) 7.5mm caliber of ammo (I've already started stocking up). Mine was originally issued to Hans Rudi Steiner of Basel (name and hometown are recorded on a tag behind the stock's metal buttplate).

In the interest of "completing" the K31, I ordered a leather sling. Bayonets for these prohibitively costly — typically going for around $100 or more, but I snagged one for $81 including postage.

Meanwhile...

MY EYES! MY EYES!
On "Thanksgiving Day" I had my first chance to fire a few rounds. I shot a total of twenty rounds at about 50 meters, and wasn't very impressed with myself (though I ended with a bullseye). It was becoming painfully obvious that my vision was deteriorating ... "right before my eyes."

With my glasses, I could see the target and the front sight, but the rear sight was blurred beyond usefulness. Without my glasses, I could see both sights, but the target was blurred to near invisibility. AARRGH! Maybe I'm just a lousy shot anyway, but I was becoming concerned about this vision thing. Then I found this site, featuring some exercises to improve vision, and this site, featuring more exercises and a useful chart, all of which might just improve my eyes' depth of field.

I plan to give these exercises a try and report back here on the results after several weeks of trying the exercises. More later.

Just Say No to the ESV

2007-07-29T07:30:00.000-07:00

A "new" English Bible translation, the "English Standard Version" (ESV) began publication in 2001, touted by its makers as (among other things) a "readable and accurate translation." Many prominent evangelical Christians (and the hordes who comprise their collective following) wasted no time boarding the ESV bandwagon, adopting it in droves as their Bible version of choice.

Not me.

I'm still waiting for a compelling argument for the ESV's superiority over the New American Standard Bible (NASB), which is more accurate while still fairly readable, or the New International Version (NIV), which is more readable while still fairly accurate. (For the sake of full disclosure, the NASB remains by far my first choice in English translations.)

The official objective of the ESV was something along the lines of a translation "more literal" than the popular NIV, but "more idiomatic" than the NASB (considered as the most literal of the modern English translations).

But whence came the alleged need/demand for something "more literal" than the NIV, but "more idiomatic" than the NASB? Am I the only one who didn't notice the loud cries reverberating throughout English-speaking Christendom for a new translation to fill the gaping void (read: niche market) between the NIV and the NASB? And by exactly what measurable and objective means is the NASB deficient or inadequate in terms of literal translation and idiomatic usage?

Nowhere have I found cogent, credible answers to these questions. Instead, it appears as if a group of Christians arbitrarily decided that their production of a new English version of the Bible, "more literal than the NIV, but more idiomatic than the NASB," was a pressing necessity — because they said so.

I couldn't disagree more (but of course, they didn't ask me).

The whole affair reminds me of Proctor & Gamble launching yet another brand of "unique" and "necessary" laundry detergent in an already saturated market. (The real "need" is for market share, not popular demand.)

The ESV is the official Bible version of the Reformed Baptist church I attend, so for nearly two years I've had an opportunity to compare it to my NASB on a weekly basis. I have yet to encounter passage of Scripture in the ESV, of which the "readability" or "accuracy" noticeably and unequivocally surpasses that of the NASB.

The net result of the ESV's emergence appears, in the end, to be yet another (in this case, less necessary than ever) English translation, touting its creators' stylistic, word-order, and idiomatic peculiarities as the latest and — as is popularly assumed (and consumed), therefore — the greatest. It simply isn't demonstrably more "readable" or "accurate" than the NASB.

In other words, it's not superior, just new and different.

"That which has been is that which will be,
And that which has been done is that which will be done.
So there is nothing new under the sun."
—Ecclesiastes 1:9 NASB (of course)

More Good Eats

2007-06-09T12:46:00.000-07:00

Having recently heard a lot of good about raw dairy products (e.g., raw cow's milk reduces allergic tendencies later in life when consumed in one's youth, and homogenized dairy is a cardiotoxin), I recently decided to introduce it to the fambly. I remembered getting raw milk during my summer stays in Switzerland in the 1970s, but had forgotten how good it was.

So I've started picking up four gallons of the stuff every other week from the fine folks at Windsong Farm near Southwest Houston. I then separate the cream, freeze one or two gallons of milk for later use, and we've been making ice cream and butter with the cream. (I also bought an ice cream maker and butter churn [photo at right], too.)

It's no surprise that the kids like it (especially the ice cream!), so it's been worth the extra expense (so far). And the wife and I are enjoying real milk in our coffee. I can't find a reliable source on the "dangers" of raw dairy products (the bias of the mass-market dairy industry and their government bureaucracy bedfellows don't count), but there's plenty of info on the health benefits of raw milk vs. pasteurized milk.

Another cool kitchen item we've found in connection with this change was the butter bell. It's a ceramic crock that keeps your butter soft and fresh by immersing it upside down in water when it's not in use. Nifty (says I)!

We've also been enjoying the occasional beef brisket and pork shoulder pairs, smoked in our little backyard smoker. Any smaller and it couldn't handle the job. But for less than $90 it's turned out some pretty consistently fine meat. My inattention to the wind direction has yielded several days of a smoke-scented household once or twice, but otherwise it's been worth it. Making the stuff last isn't all that easy with two teenage boys around.

Still, I'm glad we're all able to enjoy some of these finer things on our table, even if it's only for a season.

First Fondue!

2006-11-05T19:08:00.000-08:00

Having been at our new (rental) home for a few months now, and with cooler Fall weather replacing the typical Texas heat, we elected to christen the place with a "first Fondue" of the 2006-2007 season.

As no friends or family were available to join us, it was a simple "fambly" Fondue, which turned out to be fine with us (three teenagers can consume amazing volumes of expensive imported cheese!).

Those who know us (okay, me) will know this Fondue was a classic, authentic Swiss Fondue — not the ever-popular chocolate, or meat & oil (a.k.a. Fondue Chinoise, or Fondue Bourguignonne), this classic tradition is made with wine and Swiss cheeses. The "classic" recipe calls for half-and-half Emmentaler and Gruyère, but we prefer mostly Gruyère, or (when we can get it) Appenzeller.

The traditional Fondue wine is a Swiss Fendant (made with the Chasselas grape — Portugese "Vino Verde" can offer similar qualities at a lower price), but we have settled on (hold yer hats, wine (and Fondue) snobs) a Texas wine: The Ste. Genevieve "Texas White" from Fort Stockton. Though marketed as a table wine, we find that it has enough of a dry, semi-fruity semblance to a true Chasselas wine to qualify for a cooking purpose such as a Fondue.

Some claim a French baguette is required for Fondue, but my experience in the German-speaking regions of Switzerland suggests a more dense, somewhat larger, but still crusty, loaf to be commonplace.

Wifey (MrsPractical) enjoys a Fondue at least in part because I do most of the work: I slice the bread, cube the cheese, prep the pot, prep the Kirsch, do all the mixing and cooking, and wrestle the crispy treat from the bottom of the pot after it has cooled... All she has to do is set the table (or get the kids to do it), and put mini-gherkins and pickled mini-onions in bowls.

Oh yeah — and then she cleans up after me.